It Sucks To Be You!

Siri Is So Frigid!

2012-01-23T15:21:00.009+08:00

Siri, the voice activated helper on the iPhone 4s, can be a lot of fun and, when you push her out of her comfort zone, can be funny without trying.

Here is some of my dirtier conversations trying to get Siri to put out....

The Dark Knight Rises!

2011-12-21T11:09:00.001+08:00

Speaks for itself....

Whats The Buzz, Tell Me Whats'a Happening

2011-10-18T15:43:00.006+08:00

With Facebook and Twitter who needs a personal blog any more? Meh, right? Well I'm posting something just for the sake of posting! So Nah!

Awesome girlfriend and all round amazing person, Leash, is celebrating her 30th in Phuket. While she is away she is leaving me surprises all around the house for random smiles.

The first surprise popped up not long after she left. A note on my copy of F1 2011 for PS3......

Next a Calendar reminder popped up on my phone with a special sweet message.

Leash has hinted that there are more surprises on the way for me to find. I'm feeling pretty loved! This should help get through the next 11 days stuck at home enjoying the sweet smell of two year olds poo and tripping over toy mine fields while she is partying in a foreign country.

Can't Forget This!

2011-07-22T15:31:00.004+08:00

I just wanna save this so I can embarrass her with it in years to come! Téa on Sunrise! So what is her favourite hat?

Or this......

Téa Smith appearing on 92.9 Breakfast radio Perth by Téa Smith

One more...

J&S Introduce Australia's Most (Read: Almost) Desperate Woman: Téa Smith by joshuawithers

Day 08 - A Song That You Know All The Words Too

2011-04-07T11:29:00.002+08:00

Whats the point of doing this if you don't get a little embarrassing..... Partners in Kryme! TURTLE POWER!!!

Day 07 - A Song That Reminds You Of A Certain Event

2011-04-06T15:33:00.002+08:00

Seriously? These questions suck! Hmmmm well the word event made me think sports and the best sporting event of our generation was Mark Webber winning the 2009 German GP! The song they played, Advance Australia Fair of course!

So that is what I have, our national anthem. Just for a change lets spice it up a bit with Adam Hill's version.

Day 06 - A Song That Reminds You Of Somewhere

2011-04-05T11:43:00.002+08:00

This doesn't just remind me of a place. It puts me back to Vic Park in spring 1996.

Day 05 - A Song That Reminds You Of Someone

2011-04-04T12:09:00.003+08:00

I wont say who or why but this scene from Almost Famous reminds me of someone. Actually the whole movie makes me think of someone but you want a song, not a movie.

Day 04 - A song that makes you sad

2011-03-20T08:32:00.002+08:00

In 2003, singer/songwriter Elliot Smith stabbed himself after a domestic with his girlfriend. Smith died a short time later in hospital. Suicide had always been a theme close to Smith throughout his life as he suffered with depression. It's been said that during the last few years of his life, thoughts of his death weighed heavily on his soul.

Late by Ben Folds is Ben's heartfelt message to Smith after his suicide. It's takes you to a place where you think about all the people you have known that have passed.

An Emotional Response

2011-03-20T08:20:00.003+08:00

After a week of continual bombardment of horrific images from Japan its hard to be as distressed as you were the first time. Occasionally a video comes out of Japan that shows a personal side that makes it real again. Pretty powerful images, I didn't make it past the girl making it into the building before it got to me.

Day 03 - A song that makes you happy

2011-03-18T11:39:00.002+08:00

Awww come on!!!! Really? OK, but this one will probably turn up in a later question too. I had never really listened to it till I saw the opening scene of Lost season 2 where we first meet Desmond.

A Little Bit of Hope

2011-03-18T11:07:00.003+08:00

So much crap on YouTube of singers who cant sing. Thankfully, there is an occasional standout. You need to at least watch the first one.

Day 02 - Your least favourite song

2011-03-17T17:03:00.002+08:00

Seriously, how am I meant to answer this one? Anyway, what does it even mean? The least of my favourites? So of the list of my favourite songs, what is the least favourite? Who knows, I'm already thinking this 30 day thing is getting harder than its worth.

Lets try this.....

Day 01 - Your Favourite Song

2011-03-16T12:24:00.001+08:00

This is my favourite song today. It might not be tomorrow but it's fun.

The 30 Day Song Challenge.

2011-03-16T12:21:00.002+08:00

Remember the 30 day challenge? People blogged about themselves in a TMI fashion for 30 days. Some, includig me stopped after the first few days. Well, I thought this idea might be more fun. I might learn something about myself (Probably not) but I will have fun rocking out. Some of the questions look a but hard. Some thinking definitely required.

(Excuse the formatting, copied straight from somewhere else and Im not fixing it!)
day 01 - your favorite song
day 02 - your least favorite song
day 03 - a song that makes you happy
day 04 - a song that makes you sad
day 05 - a song that reminds you of someone
day 06 - a song that reminds you of somewhere
day 07 - a song that reminds you of a certain event
day 08 - a song that you know all the words to
day 09 - a song that you can dance to
day 10 - a song that makes you fall asleep
day 11 - a song from your favorite band
day 12 - a song from a band you hate
day 13 - a song that is a guilty pleasure
day 14 - a song that no one would expect you to love
day 15 - a song that describes you
day 16 - a song that you used to love but now hate
day 17 - a song that you hear often on the radio
day 18 - a song that you wish you heard on the radio
day 19 - a song from your favorite album
day 20 - a song that you listen to when you’re angry
day 21 - a song that you listen to when you’re happy
day 22 - a song that you listen to when you’re sad
day 23 - a song that you want to play at your wedding
day 24 - a song that you want to play at your funeral
day 25 - a song that makes you laugh
day 26 - a song that you can play on an instrument
day 27 - a song that you wish you could play
day 28 - a song that makes you feel guilty
day 29 - a song from your childhood
day 30 - your favorite song at this time last year

The Day After My World Changed Forever

2011-03-08T10:40:00.007+08:00

I'll always remember this day as the day after Mina was born. Mina was about 22 hours old when Rove Live was interrupted for live vision of the World Trade Centre on fire.

9 Years later this footage has been released under Freedom of Information laws by the National Institute of Standards and Technology. If they felt it was worth fighting to release, I'll give it a look.

What A Difference 3 Years Makes!

2011-02-23T12:34:00.007+08:00

I can't believe how much my life has changed in the last 3 years. 3 years ago I was living in Darlington with my wife and 2 kids. I worked 5 days a week and I actually thought my marriage was doing OK. LinkArtist was growing and moving forward and, for the most part I thought everyone was happy. We were even trying for a baby!

The average weekday would be; Up at 5 to make the 30 minute drive to work. Drive a bus for most of the day. Days generally consisted of split shifts so if I had a long lunch break I would use them to either gain overtime, read a book or socialise. I would get home by 7.30 and eat a dinner cooked by T before helping the kids to bed and loading the dishwasher. Night time might be an episode of Dexter before falling asleep by 10.

It's easy to see in hindsight where it got stale, especially for T who for the most part was pushing shit uphill with her business while taking care of a 2 yr old at home full time and a 6 yr old at school. It's also easy to forget that was also the time when my mental health started degrading. The memory blocks out the bad times but they were there.

Today my life is totally different! I live in Atwell with my 3 kids and I'm divorced. I no longer drive a bus, instead choosing to follow my dreams of being a published author (even if I know nothing about novel writing). I am enrolled in university through OUA studying for a degree that will be awarded by Griffith University in Queensland. I blog, tweet, Facebook and look after my kids 86% of the time. My mental health is awesome and gets better with every passing day. I'm happily dating and if the right girl comes along, open to marriage.

Now my average weekday would be; up and 6.30, later if I can get away with it. Feed and wrangle the kid to get them to school. Home from the school trip by 9, I spend time with my baby, Angus, till about 10. Angus chills with some TV till 10.30 when I put him for a nap. I write, blog, tweet, email and study from 10 through lunch till the end of school. Once the kids are home they are fed again and I try to do the housework. There is no point doing housework while they are at school or they will think the fairies do it! Feed them again around 6, bath time, bed time, more housework then, laptop in front of the TV till midnight when I go to bed.

Now all that may sound boring but it is comfortable and I've never been happier. With a bit of luck my effort will lead to success and future happiness. Anyway, thats an average weekday. The weekends is where it gets fun!!!

Jason’s adventure at Perth Sexpo 09 or How I went from sane adult to crazed pervert in 2.7 seconds.

2011-02-13T10:59:00.010+08:00

A while ago I published this story on Contempt for Humanity. That site has been removed but with Sexpo only a couple of months away I wanted to warm up to it and re-publish this story. At the time the article was quite popular and well read. Re-reading it now just shows me how much my writing has progressed over the last two years. Anyway, please relive and enjoy my adventure at Sexpo. I hope to bring you more coverage and better access when Sexpo comes to Perth soon.

Entering Sexpo is just like entering any tradeshow: packed and overwhelming. You spend the first few minutes just trying to orientate: Where am I, where should I be going? You get sucked along with the crowd past the first of many, many sex stores displaying cheap wang-bong vibrators and poorly made R rated porn.

As I was heading in no particular direction, a nicely dressed (undressed?) woman handed me a free show bag filled with those glamourous trucker magazines The Picture and People, I think to make sure I had something to do with my hands. The bag came in handy later on, not really sure the mags will.

After 10 minutes I finally got to see breasts. 10 whole minutes? Had I been looking in the right places? This is Sexpo right, why does everybody have their tops on?

The breasts were attached to Harmony “porn star” Keisha Kane, who was selling the rights to have a picture taken with her while she displayed her acting talent by pretending to fuck you. With props within reach, Keisha was all too happy to place a fake cock on your groin and suck on it so patrons could go home with a picture sure to impress Grandma. Amused by this, I hung a round for a bit and watched the patrons pose for their photo.

Keisha seemed very accommodating and pleasant to everybody that met her - but I knew I could never have a photo like that featuring myself.

First of all, my wife wouldn’t approve, and future generations could suffer the consequences … plus - a Harmony porn star? Come on!

Still observing, I imagined Keisha talking like a roit chav eh.

“Cum ‘ere luv and grab me arrse! That’s it darlin’!”

If I wanted to watch naked Chavs go at it I would go hang outside Rob Kidman’s place.

Further down the hall (and after having a deep and meaningful with licensed area hot girl whose sole mission in life is to make me buy an $8 beer) we arrive at the back of a huge crowd. It’s actually the stage, where Penthouse Pet and world-renowned exotic dancer Suzie Q is starting her performance.

Suzie does an aerial performance that would be difficult for all but Olympic gymnasts - but she does it with her clothes off! Finally, after wandering the hall for 40 minutes my Sexpo adventure is starting and I feel excited to be there!

Reenergised, I start heading towards the back of that hall again stopping at the stalls, buying show bags and all the while flirting with the sales girls. Why? Because it’s Sexpo! You can’t help yourself! Once the moment has caught up with you it’s embrace it or go home! I even started rethinking my attitudes towards posing with Keisha.

After watching Keisha suck on a Dildo again my senses caught up and sanity prevailed. There will be no photo with Keisha and in fact I’m starting to wonder if Keisha is the anti-sexpo. How can a porn star rob me of the lust for Sexpo that I had not 2 minutes before?

My eyes catch another attraction.

Ride the Gerbil! Ride the fucking Gerbil! The Gerbil is like a Ghost Train for sex. In fact, I think they just bought a second hand ghost train and gave the ghosts hard-ons! After queuing up for 5 minutes and handing over your $4 (maybe the cheapest thing at Sexpo) you sit in the Gerbil and hold on to the handrail. My handrail was a set of boobs. My brother hung on to the cocks, but only because I made him - and since I was paying I thought it was only fair.

I don’t remember much about the Gerbil. It was very dark and hard to see but I’m pretty sure a robot cum on my face. It made spots on my glasses! Would have been nice to actually see more inside the ride but then again maybe not. I wouldn’t recommend the Gerbil not even at $4.

With two Sexpo setbacks I had to get the mojo back and fast! The most famous, not to be missed show at Sexpo is the Sexpo Showgirls and they were on in 15 minutes. Time to hit the stage!

Nice and early, I got a place right up the front and waited patiently. Patiently? Yeah right. The next 15 minutes was full of “Now what’s the time?” as my brother faithfully answered, “Two minutes since you last asked!” I stopped asking and used the clock on my phone instead. Every time I looked at my phone the picture of my 3 year old son stared back at me from the screen as if to say ‘Where are you Dad? Can I come?’ He would have liked Sexpo.

It’s 9.15 and Russell the-only-thing-I-ever-did-was-the-postie-on-The-Comedy-Company Gilbert takes to the stage with the requisite ‘RUSSELLLLL!!!’ from the bogans in the crowd. It’s time for the Showgirls!

The Showgirls are Jewell, Taylor and Trinity. Taylor and Trinity profess to be lesbian lovers in one of the trucker magazines. Lucky for us they found each other! The show is awesome. The most awesome thing at Sexpo, in fact the most awesome thing in Perth ever! Well worth the price of admission three times over. That’s when it happened. Camera blazing I went from sane adult to crazed pervert. The sort of crazed pervert I remember being at 16 years old but not since. Crazed and irrational.

Jewell is now my one and only and if the chance arose we would run off together and live happily ever after! What wife? What children? They are dead to me. I love Jewell and I’m sure with a bit of help, the sort of help found in the character of John Fowels’s book, The Collector, she would love me too!

The Showgirls perform to 3 songs – ending, quite amazingly, with Jewell receiving a bath from the other girls (including a “clean” that only a cat is used to in the privates!) Taylor then showered me with the water from the sponge. The perks of being up front!

After the show I only existed in 16-year-old crazy perve mode. Showgirl show bags are available from the side of the stage complete with a DVD of tonight’s performance and a picture with the girls. My girls. My Jewell!

I hurried. I may have pushed people over, but in my defence they shouldn’t have been in the way! I jumped in line.

“Here’s $30, $60 just take my fucking wallet, I don’t care!”

At this point I have no idea where my brother is. I left him behind. He could be dead for all I care. I’m going to meet Jewell! I later found out he was busy watching a silhouette of a couple fucking or making out or some such shit.

I wait in line.

The man running the stall is very protective of the girls, maybe too much. These girls were just on stage, swapping spit with a thousand cameras flashing at them, yet now that they are in the stall photography seems to be outlawed.

“Oi, put it away! You want a picture you pay!” he yells every time he sees a flash go off towards the girls. He seems tough but I’m sure I could take him if he gets inbetween my beloved Jewell and I!

My turn. I sit on a stool between the lovers and wrap my hands around their waist. Jewell sits in front. I think at this point I should mention that the 16-year-old perve is also a polite gentleman. I was shocked. I found myself using all my “please” and “thankyous” as I talk to the girls. It was uncontrollable yet the girls seemed to like it. It may have shocked them too. In the time it took for the camera to go click I was pushed along to a new line, autographs.

The girls take all the pictures for everyone in line then move down to the table to sign the trucker magazine and their poster. I wait patiently. In only moments I’m going to talk to Jewell and she is going to run away with me and we are going to have our happily ever after moment.

I wait in line.

Jewell talks to me, me! I love a girl who makes the first move!

“What’s your name sweetie?”

I melt.

Pause.

Shit, I have to talk.

“Jason.”

She starts personalising a copy of her poster for me.

“How’s your day been?”

A second question. This is my way in. This is my time to tell her everything!

“Er….”

I squeak.

“Gre…great.”

“That’s awesome honey. This is Jason.”

Jewell tells the other girls my name. Taylor says something but I don’t hear her. I have stopped listening. I feel myself shuffle away from Jewell. At the end of the desk I am given my posters and told to wait again for my photo. The moment has passed. I have lost her forever.

When the photos are done Trinity comes out to the crowd and hands them out. I never see Jewell again.

I find my brother staring at the porno silhouettes and ask him if there is anything else he would like to do. We head towards the one place we haven’t been, The Laporium. Is that even a word?

The Laporium is just a sleazy strip joint inside the hall. It’s dark, smelly and creepy, just like a real strip joint. I pay the cover charge for both of us, $20, before we enter and find a chair.

On stage is a sweaty girl with no attractive features wriggling around on the floor like she is having an epileptic fit. I start wondering if anyone is going to help her or if I should call an ambulance. No one seems to be worried so I don’t either.

Moments later we are approached by a girl who starts gyrating on the bench in front of us. She is drenched with sweat and has a smell I don’t recognise. Her eyes told us that she was under the influence of something and it wasn’t alcohol.

She grabs my brother’s leg. I have trouble making out the conversation over the noise.

“What’s your name?”

“Daniel.”

“I can give you a dance.”

“Ur…”

I should say that sometimes, Daniel sounds like Butthead from MTV’s Beavis and Butthead. I don’t think it’s intentional but if it is he is really good at it.

“Ur….I don’t have any money.”

“But you’re at Sexpo, you have money! $40!”

She licks her finger and runs it down her body till it finally finds her crotch where it lingers. That’s when she looks to me.

“What’s your name?”

I try not to answer. She doesn’t give up.

“How about $50 for both.”

“No we are fine. Thank you.”

She leaves and I breathe a sigh of relief. I ask my brother if he wants to leave the Laporium. He answers by making for the door.

I bathe in the neon light and fresh air that waits outside The Laporium. I look up, maybe to thank the Lord for getting me out of such an awful place and I see the big screen for the stage is gearing up for the next performance, the amateur strip.

The amateur strip is open to anyone who wants to take his or her clothes off in front of the crowd. There are only two rules. The crowd is not allowed to boo and the strippers don’t need to take off their underwear.

The girls are first up. Russell takes up his MC duties and goes down the line of contestants.

“What’s your name?”

“Chantel!!!!! Whoooo!!!”

“Hey alright!. What do you do Chantel?”

“Hair dresser!!!! Yeah!!!!!!!”

Chantel has brought a friend, it seems, because the next girl is also a hairdresser. Russell uses this as an opportunity to show the crowd why he hasn’t been on TV for 20 years.

“I went to the hairdresser once and asked for an Elvis cut. The hairdresser shaved off all my hair! I said oi, this isn’t how Elvis wore his hair to which the hairdresser replied. It would be if he fucken had his hair cut here!”

Oh why isn’t The Comedy Company still on TV?! It made me laugh when I was eight!

The girls get a couple of minutes to strip. I was really excited that the girl who was not really fat but had enough crevasses on her front to lose M&M’s and such had enough of a positive body image to strip in front of everyone. I wish I had that confidence!

Eventually a winner is picked through the impartial, “audience applause” method, while the girls who lost immediately show remorse across their faces. Some even go so far as to cover themselves with their arms even though only moments before they were dancing like ladettes just before closing. The winner received a bag of goodies from Adult Shop apparently worth $200. Not really worth whoring yourself up on stage for, granted, but the audience had fun and that’s all that matters in show business.

The guys go next and Russell doesn’t disappoint.

“What’s you name?”

“Christian.”

“Ur huh”

Russell starts giggling at the joke he’s about to tell.

“I didn’t ask about your religion, I said what’s your name!”

“Christian.”

It becomes obvious Christian doesn’t get the joke. Russell wants to explain it to him.

“No, ur I said what’s your name and you said Christian like the church!”

“Oh”

“Yeah, get it! What do you do for a job?”

“Painter”

“Yeah well its obvious you have been sniffing too many of those fumes!”

Russell moves on.

Eventually the guys strip down to the jocks and reveal novelty jocks available from one of the stores. A winner is named and the rest show the same remorse as the women from before. They leave the stage wondering if they lost because they have a small penis.

With that we ended our night. In the end it turned out to be a lot of fun. If I had to pick some faults it would be that all the show bags were basically the same, not enough credit card facilities and taking a bulldozer to the Laporium would be nice. Also a few more topless girls and for WA to change it’s laws on X rated movies so the Sexpo can sell porn worth watching.

I’ll end with the picture of me with the Sexpo Showgirls. The love of my life in down in front.

I prefer Gnu

2011-01-17T00:07:00.004+08:00

I love how I can stick out in the minds of the people I meet, unfortunately I don't think about others as much as they do about me. I hadn't thought about this guy at all till this was brought to my attention today. As far as I knew we were all friends till I was uninvited from his wife's birthday party, even though I had got her an $80 gift. I'm not worried but, to this day, I don't know why Dan feels such hate.

This tweet was in reference to Téa Smith who, while out with my children, was bullied by a few with too much time and a bored Saturday night to fill.

My new home of F1

2010-12-30T16:29:00.003+08:00

I sat back the other day and thought to myself, what would make the 2011 Formula 1 season better? The answer, I can blog about it! I present to you Crack F1.

Crack F1 is a daily blog site dealing with the most topical and/or interesting events surrounding F1 that day. Hopefully it will be fun and informative with a bit of humour mixed in to to lighten the mood. Crack F1, scraping Formula 1 off the bottom of our shoe.

Red Bull in Perth

2010-12-08T10:11:00.002+08:00

I need to save myself from beige!

2010-12-01T12:10:00.001+08:00

My house is so bright and boring! I want a house that is dark and quirky! All this IKEA can get the fuck out!

Social Media: The Twitter Divorce.

2010-11-05T14:23:00.003+08:00

Today was meant to be my article on divorce. I feel pretty down today as the Twitter gossip mill still hatefully churns in my absence so instead I'll spoon feed this link. It's a pretty cool article by Amanda Fortini.

The Facebook Divorce

Social Media: Can I Get A Patch?

2010-11-04T09:55:00.002+08:00

Self help and support groups exist for just about every addiction and activity, why not social media? Like smokers, the first thing I would grab for in the morning was Twitter. Like and alcoholic, I would Tweet in bed till I fell asleep. I would reward myself after every activity with a check of Twitter on my iPhone. Are these not the actions of someone with a problem?

There is no patch or way to moderate so how do you solve the social media addiction? The short answer, I don't know. I searched the net for hours trying to find something to help me. The best I could find was "use in moderation". That's great for normal people. I can drink in moderation, I can even smoke in moderation but Twitter in moderation? Unless Michael Malone himself, comes out of the sky and limits my net access, I will be forever drawn to Twitter. Its my connection, its my world.

What I did to fight the social media addiction isn't for everybody but Im sure, like most things, it will get better over time. Account deletion. There is no turning back from account deletion. Twitter currently has no ability to restore old accounts. Once that small button is clicked, it's all gone, super quick and no fuss. Two years of friend finding, like sharing and rant posting, gone! Was it premature? I had planned on doing it on Saturday but a couple of things brought it forward and in the heat of the moment I sent that account into purgatory for all its sins..... I so want it back!

I wonder how @sach33's crochless pants are holding up in the heat? Did @kendylahlah's new fan help? Which young girl is @GeoffD710 being dirty with today? What is @miss_yolie wearing?

As you can see, nothing on Twitter is truly important but it's addictive. I wish I had some answers.

That felt so good

2010-11-03T17:36:00.003+08:00

I was going to put off deleting Twitter till Saturday but after having a pretty shit and emotional day I just did it and it felt good!

I will continue writing to the theme of this week on my blog but now I don't have twitter to advertise them they probably wont be read. :)

Social Media: Gossip Girls, The Peep Culture

2010-11-03T10:39:00.003+08:00

It starts young. Six year olds whispering about who is boyfriend and girlfriend, who likes who and guess who was in the tree K.I.S.S.I.N.G. Unfortunately getting older doesn't add sophistication just levels of animosity and hate. That girl is up herself, that guy moved on awful fast, he shouldn't see her, they are having sex, did you hear about what she did to those other guys...... Gossip is prevalent and not going anywhere.

In 2006, Twitter enters the online market with a simple idea, to broadcast SMS style messages to an audience. A harmless idea in 2006, largely baulked at by peers, has grown into an international success with over 100 million subscribers. The world stepped into the peep culture.

Peep culture is best described by Hal Niedzviecki in The Peep Diaries,

We have entered the age of "peep culture": a tell-all, show-all, know-all digital phenomenon that is dramatically altering notions of privacy, individuality, security, and even humanity. Peep culture is reality TV, YouTube, MySpace, Facebook, Twitter, over-the-counter spy gear, blogs, chat rooms, amateur porn, surveillance technology, Dr. Phil, Borat, cell phone photos of your drunk friend making out with her ex-boyfriend, and more. In the age of peep, core values and rights we once took for granted are rapidly being renegotiated, often without our even noticing.

So what does it really mean to us? Gossip, on a large scale and generally through people with no real knowledge of the person they are gossiping about is dangerous. Gossip passes so quickly, any ounce of truth is passed off for the muddy story, the lies and deceit. In an online environment, where relationships are formed and lost so passionately and quickly, friendship is a tradable commodity.

So who can you trust? The answer is everybody but it comes with conditions. To survive in a Twitter world you have to accept everybody at face value. If you really like someone but hear they have been talking about you behind your back, consider the source. File the information under gossip and move on. It's likely to be a concoction or a muddle of chinese whispers regurgitated by someone who really doesn't like you.

What happens if I find out exactly who has been lying and gossiping about me? Block and remove them. It wont stop them gossiping about you but it will remove some of their ability to spy and twist your innocent tweets. The simple act of blocking someone carries a lot of power in the Twitter world, I'm always surprised by just how many people get upset by an un-follow.

Online Gossip has been most damaging to me personally over the last few months. It has caused fights that have lasted days between my ex and I and it has hurt people close to me. If we don't remove its power it will destroy all our real world relationship leaving us with...... Twitter.

Continue to check back as I spend the week analysing the peep culture before removing myself from the party.

Social Media: The First Hit is Free

2010-11-01T09:22:00.004+08:00

Some moments stand out in the memory. The first kiss with someone new, the birth of a child, the day a musician died, our life is full of memories most important to us. Two days that cant be forgotten for some are the day they signed up to Facebook and the day they let Twitter into their lives.

I rejected Facebook at first. Finally, under almost crushing weight from friends and old school mates I joined Facebook in late 2007 as a way to connect with school friends before my ten year high school reunion. Almost instantly I began filling my time with games of rock, paper, scissors and Battleship with people I haven't seen in almost ten years. The social media addiction had begun and the first hit was free!

November 2008 my partner was away at The Edge of the Web, a conference held in Perth by The Australian Web Industry Association. I cant recall how I noticed but my partner, along with most of the conference, had started using Twitter as a way of passing notes in class. Seeing a way of being able to communicate with her while she sat in a lecture, I signed up to Twitter and joined in the conversation.

Over the next two years my involvement with Twitter grew. Eventually I met avatars in real life, became involved in the lives of strangers and found dates. After an accident which left me without work, Twitter replaced the relationships I had lost with colleagues and friends from work. After separating with my partner, Twitter became company at night when the house was quiet. I started checking Twitter every 5 minutes during the household chores and even tweet while driving. Twitter had crossed over and replaced real life.

Recently, as a result of separation from my partner of 10 years and a connection with the lives of the avatars, Twitter has become the dumping ground for hear-say, lies and gossip. Unfortunately the human condition promotes embellished stories and chinese whispers. Truth gets pushed aside for a better story and sympathy regardless who those lies may hurt. The need to win support from those who happily gossip and fuel the lies for their own amusement becomes justification to make the lies bigger. The result becomes a lawyers dream where the truth is buried deep down under the pile of defamation.

My ex has been a great friend and mother to our kids for almost half my life. I've always wanted to love and support her the best I can. I feel no anger towards her and wish her all the happiness in the world. I'm excited for her and the adventures she will have in the future. I have always considered her unique and beautiful with a drive that will bring her the world.

During this week I will try to delve deeper into the peep culture before finally removing myself from the party. Leaving the party while its still in full force can't stop the gossip but I hope it can dull the conversation.

Phobias

2010-10-30T00:19:00.001+08:00

I thought for a while about phobias before sitting down. Growing up in Australia teaches you very quickly to make peace with the bugs and snakes. Poor Rob, as much as I would love for him to visit, wouldn’t last a day before retreating to the top of a table only to find that the spiders are just as much at home on the ceiling as they are on the floor. Something did stand out in the memory banks as a crazy fear I had as a child, the fear of heights.

Between the ages of 6 and 10 I had a crushing fear of heights. While all the other kids would climb on the playground, I would keep my feet firmly in the sand. I don’t want to revisit that playground because I’m sure that I’m taller than it now but for that little 6 year old Jason, climbing onto that wood and rope covered adventure frame represented death! The fear that if I fell my head would be smashed into a million tiny pieces.

Thankfully, I no longer have that fear. I went on to study aviation at a school that required four hours on a bus. Taking my first flight in a plane I felt no fear, only boredom. Did you know there is nothing to do up there? I stuck out the aviation course for four of the required five years but I just couldn’t come to terms with the sheer boredom of flying.

As an adult and very new to the dating scene again I only have one fear. You get to know someone, maybe only briefly, romance takes over, the pants come off and she isn’t a she but rather a pre-op transsexual. She was so convincing! I’m not judging anyone’s lifestyle, I just like girls! Girls with girl parts! The last thing I want to see down there is my reflection. That’s not to say I would stop things progressing after that revelation, that story is for another time. I think The Kinks tell this story amazingly in musical form.

*First published on Geek Life*

I'm a graph!

2010-10-22T14:12:00.004+08:00

Did I go too far?

Thanks Seb, I think.

Peek Social Media - An Idea

2010-10-22T10:14:00.004+08:00

How many social media sites can survive in a flooded market? There is no easy answer for this. Markets evolve and change, people age and grow. Remember when you listened to the radio station aimed at the kids while cursing out the station aimed at the over 30s. How long was it before you realised you had long since tuned to the long hated station because it was playing all the songs you loved from your teen station? Will social media exhibit the same trends?

I want to look into these trends in a future Geek Life, for now I'm just amazed at how many social media sites I fill my day with. No matter how many sites I use, I am only touching the surface of all the endless sharing possibilities! I like to think Im a hardcore social media junky, but I'm really just a casual observer.

A short list of my casual observing, some you can find links for at the side of the screen.

Twitter
Facebook
Dailybooth
Flickr
Formspring
Foursquare
Tumblr
Blogger
Tweetphoto
Twitpic
Youtube
Yahoo Groups
Group Spaces
Smashwords
Photobucket
Shazam
Skype
gmail

Put your iPod on shuffle: What are the first 10 songs that play?

2010-10-16T12:22:00.003+08:00

I'm not doing the 30 day challenge anymore but I love this question, being a music lover, so I thought I would give it a go.

Elliot Smith: Twilight.
Sublime: Smoke Two Joints.
Janis Joplin: Goin' To Brownsville.
Willie Dixon: 29 Ways.
Tiesto: Dance4life.
R.E.M.: The Great Beyond.
Carol King: I Feel the Earth Move.
Muddy Waters: I Can't be Satisfied.
Genesis: Your Own Special Way.
Ella Fitzgerald: You're the Top.

I don't want to stop at 10, its too much fun! 10 more?

Beck: Beautiful Way.
Ben Folds: Cologne.
The Cardigans: In the Round.
Clem Snide: Messiah Complex Blues.
Rage Against the Machine: In My Eye.
Mr Oizo: The Salad.
Silverchair: Abuse Me.
David Bowie: Sound and Vision.
Jeff Buckley: Last Goodbye.
The Flaming Lips: Slow Motion.

No repeated artists? Probably because my iPhone is so full of music it runs slow!

The Outdoor Office

2010-10-01T23:56:00.004+08:00

I remember first hearing about bloggers writing while spending the day at cafés. How awesome I thought it would be to be able to hang out all day in the sun and write. Perth being slow to the Internet revolution, and myself bogged down with the chores of kids and work, I never made it to a café with my computer, until now. Armed with a few hours and my trusty MacBook, I picked my favourite café, Mooba in Subiaco, and headed out into the late morning sun.

Mooba is a small place tucked behind the bustle of Subiaco. It’s out of the way enough that if the owners hadn’t done such a great job marketing it with social media I would never have heard of it. Check in with Foursquare here ten times and Mooba will shout you a coffee. A regular tweetup (Twitter meet up) helps create interest and keep an online buzz peaking with all the cool kids of the net regularly attending.

I ordered breakfast and found a place outside. My pure white MacBook looks the part in Subiaco. Only moments after setting up my wifi, coffee arrives, chased by my breakfast so fast the cook must have been eavesdropping on my order from the kitchen. It’s so beautiful, the judges on Masterchef wouldn’t be able to fault it. I wish I had thought to take a picture for this article but I couldn’t wait to poke the fork in.

Writing outside is great. A quick change to the brightness setting and you are off. Connecting to Mooba’s wifi is super simple. Two clicks and you are away, super quick and effortless. Writing, tweeting and perving on all the fine people enjoying the outdoors, who could ask for more? While I write, hot coffee is coming whenever I call for it like I’m some sort of hedonist king. Before I leave I will make sure to try their large selection of desserts. I think I heard something about a double choc muffin something-or-other on twitter this morning.

I can’t fault this method of writing. Sun, coffee and gorgeous people. I’m quickly becoming a convert and pretty sure this will become part of my Saturday morning routine. If I don’t get to write some Saturdays, it will be because I get to talk to the beautiful people, all drawn to the awesome that is café living.

How does this apply to the geeks? If you are a geek and you aren’t getting your daily dose of vitamin D, get outside! The computer will be there when you get back. Hell, take the computer with you like I do. It will do heaps for your soul. Research has shown that as little as an hour outside can improve your attention and memory by up to 20%! It reduces cases of depression and increases your life expectancy. So really, you can’t afford to not pack up the laptop and head outside!

*This article first published on Geek Life*

I just wanted to say one thing.

2010-09-28T22:42:00.001+08:00

With everything that has been said today I have one thing I was to say in my defence.

Why I Will Be Single Forever

2010-08-24T12:02:00.004+08:00

Recently separated and looking towards the future I thought I would do a few calculations regarding my relationship future.

Odds of finding a single woman who shares a physical attraction, doesn't mind my children, is brunette, is smart, funny, happy, around 30, likes The Simpsons, doesn't mind I will never be rich, is happy for me to dabble in writing and soon to be stand up even though I will probably never earn a cent from it, likes simple things and doesn't plan how she will buy the next big item: 0.0023% #itsscience

Geostalker Media

2010-08-18T10:08:00.001+08:00

I have been active on the net for almost half my life. I remember the early days when privacy was paramount. Google jaso32, the ‘handle’ I’ve had since 3 minutes after logging into the net, and you can search back years of Usenet trolling with fake email addresses and other similar methods to keep Jason and jaso32 separate.

Why is it now, a bit over a decade later, that we have lifted the curtain and reversed that trend so far the other way?

Far more prominent on Google than my attempts at keeping myself separate from jaso32 is that now jaso32 and Jason are one and the same. Google is generous enough to show you my whole life! My blog, my Facebook, Twitter, Formspring and most importantly Four Square.

Four Square is a relatively new geosocial networking site where you can record your activities. At the movies? Tell Four Square. On a boat? Tell Four Square. Four Square lets you record, in great detail, all your outdoor activities. Some other special features of Four Square let you share tips about venues and even offer reviews. Connect Four Square to Twitter and Facebook and you can share your adventures with an even bigger audience.

As a peer review application I love Four Square. Nothing makes me happier than warning people away from an awful Mcdonalds but Four Square has a much darker use, cyberstalking.

Initially I was a bit worried about the implications of posting my adventures but was quick to relax. I don’t know why I dismissed my worries so fast. Maybe it was the challenge of collecting Four Square badges, a method of retaining user interest, maybe it was the fun of social media. I don’t know why but like a million other Four Square users, I relaxed.

As an unemployed stay at home parent my routine is very open. I am rarely ever in the same place at the same time, unlike millions of worker. A few hours research into these people alarmed me. I noticed a few of these people regularly reported to Four Square their location and the awesomely stalkeriffic thing I noticed, they had patterns. I noticed one Twitter friend was always at the gym at the same time every day. Another was at a train station at the same time. The list grew. How easy would it be to follow one of these people, having never met them. A simple chat on Twitter could evolve into something similar to the plot of a Hollywood thriller.

It certainly appears that the trend for owning your internet persona is increasing but who is pushing the move? Four Square is only 16 months old yet internet giant Yahoo has offered $125 million dollars US to purchase the service. Why? Geosocial media offers a wealth of consumer information. Shopping trends, eating trends and even transport trends are all worth major money. Information gathered could help sell the next Coke product or the next war. Every dollar built off the concept of marketing your thoughts.

If geosocial media is so controlling why do I regularly contribute? Seriously, I don’t know. For me I suppose it’s a way to snark at life. Thanks to Four Square, I’m the ‘mayor‘ of crazy town. I dont take it seriously and try to have as much fun as possible. With all these things considered, my only genuine complaint is I dont get a slice of that multi million dollar pie! Find me on Four Square or check me out on Twitter. Come on, it’s fun!

Do you over share on the net?

Formula 1 Racing Has Lost Its Way

2010-08-18T10:03:00.002+08:00

At the start of the F1 Summer break there is much for Australian racing fans to be happy about with Mark Webber in control of the drivers championship but why can’t Formula 1 stay away from controversy?

As an Australian boy I was only exposed to F1 once a year, The Australian Grand Prix. With only a passing fancy, I supported Damon Hill and Williams at the ‘94 GP and saw first hand what the best of the best drivers will do for a victory.

During the ‘94 Australian GP, the final race of the season, Michael Schumacher was in position in front of Hill. With only a one point advantage, Schumacher needed to keep a position in front of Hill to claim his first championship. Making a mistake, Schumacher let Hill into a passing opportunity but rather then concede the place Schumacher drove his car into the side of Hill putting himself out of the race instantly while Hill retired in the pits from damage due to the accident. Waiting for Hill to make another lap, Schumacher learnt of Hill’s retirement from a marshal and the famous Schumacher smirk was seen around the world as he claimed the first of his 7 championships from the corner of Flinders Street. At 14, it was the first time I had ever witnessed what it takes to be a winner and I fell in love with motorsport.

Three years later Schumacher found himself in the same position, this time against Canadian Jacques Villeneuve. Schumacher was leading the Jerez GP in front of Villeneuve when he had trouble keeping pace. Buzzing all around the back of Schumacher’s Ferrari, Villeneuve dove down the inside of a corner to take the lead. Never one to concede a place, Schumacher drove into Villeneuve in the same fashion as he had to win the ‘94 championship but unfortunately for Schumacher his Ferrari only made contact with the side pod of Villeneuve’s car and Villeneuve drove on to become the ‘97 world champion.

Examples just like these are littered throughout Formula 1 history. The glory days of Senna, Mansell and Prost when teams like McLaren and Williams ruled produce endless lists of drivers doing what it takes to win and we remember them. We remember them fondly and wish F1 would be like that today.

Those days were by no means lawless. Drivers were just as heavily punished for rule breaches as they are today. Schumacher was harshly punished for his crash with Villeneuve in ‘97 but we don’t remember that. We don’t remember the grid penalties and fines, we remember the awesome racing. The passing, the crashes and the champions. Drivers threw the dice and accepted the consequences.

These days the drivers race to save money. The dollar (or Euro as it usually is) is more important than the victory. Gone are the passing manoeuvres we remember, replaced by a precession. Don’t go anywhere near another car or fear the reprimand waiting for you in pit lane. Small amounts of greatness are dragged through the media, chastised and spat out.

Mark Webber and Sebastian Vettel crashed during the Turkish GP earlier this year which created an endless supply of media attention. All because Vettel wanted to drive like his heros. The race lead was one place in front of him and he wanted it. Vettel moved up the inside of Webber and imitated his hero Schumacher by veering towards Webber in an attempt to scare Webber away from his position. Webber didn’t yield and both drivers crashed, Vettel out of the race and Webber finished a distant third. This is an example of a great racing manoeuvre. Fans should see this several times a race not once followed with 2 weeks of media bashing afterwards! The money loving precession junkies win again.

F1 setteled down till this week when come back kid Schumacher defended his tenth position against former team mate, Barrichello. Defending the middle of the straight, Schumacher drove Barrichello towards the barrier in an attempt to keep his position. The move failed and Barrichello took tenth place. What I thought was true Schumacher brilliance was rewarded with a ten place grid penalty for the next race which will no doubt put him at the back of the field and give him eight or so cars to pass while he makes his way to his rightful position in the middle of the field. The media and team managers threw up their in disgust. How dangerous, how shameful! Shameful is F1 not seeing passing as part of the sport.

F1 no longer has thrilling races when drivers need to apply in triplicate for the right to defend or pass for position. Bring back the glory days and let up on these drivers. Just because we can watch them in slow-motion and measure every piece of precision doesn’t mean we have to regulate them like a hawk.

2010-08-18T09:17:00.001+08:00

FUCK

2010-08-18T09:16:00.001+08:00

I Heart Mark Webber!

2010-02-01T19:27:00.002+08:00

With all the 2010 F1 talk and testing at the moment I just wanted to celebrate with a few classic Mark Webber moments...

What a great Aussie! Awesome work ethic.

While we are sitting back watching the racing on TV he is out there as an ambassador for Australia. As such he is required to swear...... alot. <3

Who can forget when every Australian racing fan cried with Mark after the German GP in '09

Love you Mark!!!!!

Saget Love

2010-02-01T09:07:00.000+08:00

Rollin' with Saget - watch more funny videos

formspring.me

2010-01-30T12:53:00.001+08:00

What would your dream job look like?

I get up late, spend 4 hours online then clean up the house. What I do now. I just have to work out how to get paid for it :(

Ask me anything

formspring.me

2010-01-30T12:52:00.001+08:00

What do you think is your most attractive feature?

My glasses.

Ask me anything

formspring.me

2010-01-30T12:15:00.001+08:00

If you could choose, how would you want to die?

Behind the wheel of something fast and expensive.

Ask me anything

Blogger is a tough bitch.

2009-10-22T09:40:00.003+08:00

"You sold out man!" Blogger scolded me in the way only a website can do.

"I'm sorry, I know. I don't know what happened."

"You use to fight the power. Your Transit WA blog pissed off the establishment! Where is it now? They got to you man!"

What crazy world had I fallen into. My blogger account was telling me off. It can't do that, can it? Has Google's powers reached that far?

"I'm sorry, OK." I'm panicking. What does it want? "Things happened. I lost my way. They asked me to delete it. I did it for work!"

"You still in that job they gave you for deleting it?"

"No."

"Well then, bring it back!"

Why would Blogger want me to bring Transit WA back? Especially after years of neglect?

"Why? Why not my old personal blog?"

"That old thing? That's not you anymore. You need to take the fight back to the man!"

"The man? What era are you even from?"

"Cos, it's you. You need to find yourself again. They have completely sapped your spirit. You are gone! What happened in that accident? Did you loose your mind too?"

How does Blogger hurt me like that? I give up. He is my Blogger after all.

"Alright, you win. Just don't expect the old Transit WA. I'm gonna do things different this time. It might take a while but I'll do it."

"Draft autosaved at 10:03AM"

"What? Blogger, you still there?"

Did I just dream that, what just happened?

"Blogger???"

My Adventure at Sexpo

2009-05-25T00:25:00.002+08:00

I visited The Perth Sexpo. Read about what I got up to at Contempt for Humanity

21 Century China

2009-02-25T16:39:00.002+09:00

A new contraceptive device is taking China by storm. Dubbed 'The internet', China hopes to have control of their population problems by 2015!

Go animate

2009-02-25T16:17:00.003+09:00

I can't stop playing with this site. One day I might make a good one.

GoAnimate.com: You to Thank - Ben Folds

GoAnimate.com: Fault Code

GoAnimate.com: Lighter side of Mad

GetUp! Campaign

2008-12-04T20:50:00.000+09:00

Judge Judy and the Case of the Earthquake

2008-08-01T12:48:00.003+08:00

I love this video because Judy doesn't stop working till the earthquake really takes hold like the earth shaking is no big thing. Once it does pick up shes out of there! The the defendant and the plaintiff didn't know what to do. They just stand there waiting for a light to drop on their head because the Judge didn't tell them they could run.

Facebook..........

2008-04-25T10:07:00.001+08:00

see more crazy cat pics

F1 (Finish)es In Style

2007-10-23T18:18:00.000+08:00

The last round of the Formula 1 championship is always exciting but when three drivers are all going for glory then its spectacular!

New driver Hamilton missed out on tying up his first championship two weeks ago by not finishing the China Grand Prix. This left Hamilton with only a 3 point advantage over two time champion Alonso and a seven point advantage over Kimi Raikkonen. In an awesome twist of fate which had Hamilton suffer car trouble and Alonso just not having the speed, Kimi Raikkonen is the newest F1 Champion.

Right from the start Ferrari were all over the two McLarens with Massa blocking Hamilton off the start leaving room for Kimi to move up into second then Kimi held off the power in front of Hamilton giving Alonso an easy pass up the inside. Blocking Hamilton to help Alonso through the gap gave Kimi the best chance of winning the championship. Hamilton, not happy with dropping two places in the first two corners tried to come back at Alonso but while making a move only inches away from the back of Alonso's car, Hamilton lost down force on his front wing and locked up his right hand front tyre.

A few laps later, Hamilton lost power in his car and spend over thirty seconds watching the whole field of cars race by. He then spent the rest of the race getting back up to eighth position giving the title to Kimi Raikkonen!

First Impressionss Of The New Perth Railway Tunnel

2007-10-15T11:00:00.001+08:00

Went down to the Esplanade station and looked around before continuing through to Perth underground and then to Leederville before coming straight back.

First impressions. Ugly, Grey, stuffy, the walk from Perth underground to Perth station is way to far, not enough escalators and the line between Perth underground an Leederville is so noisy that children were covering their ears.

Did I mention ugly? Your eyes thank you when you come up into Perth station after walking under Wellington Street.

I'm not happy that my city has to live with this eyesore, even if it is buried under the ground!

My Favourite Time

2007-10-14T11:59:00.000+08:00

Yay my favourite time is here again! Election time!

The Federal Election has been called today for the 24th of November and no I will not be running again this time. Besides last time It was the State election that I ran for. Ahh good times! I miss Graham Kierath having a go at me on his blog. Those were the days!

Welcome nosy people from my High School.

2007-09-28T13:50:00.000+08:00

Like many people I can't remember much about high school. Sure I can remember a little but most of it is really, really hazy. High school wasn't a fun place to be and anyone who says that it was the best years of their lives have had a horrid life. As you can expect a high school reunion right now surprised me.

I'm not sure why it surprised me because ten year reunions are the thing to do, maybe I was just so busy that I forgot that it had been ten years. My first comment to Téa when she broke the news was of shock.

"....but didn't Andrew (a family friend who graduated my High School a few years earlier) just have his reunion??"

"That was three years ago" Téa was more then amused with my ability to let years flash by.

So faced with a ten year reunion that I would regret not going to I went and sent my RSVP last night. To whom it went to I don't know but in a month I might just find out.

So what do you say about yourself at a reunion? You naturally think to talk up your accomplishments but how much is to much and why should I care anyway. These are people that I knew ten years ago, most of them I didn't know very well. Will they judge me and gossip about me after I have gone? Highly unlikely, most wont even recognize me. Does it matter what you do for a job? It's cool that the former manager of Nirvana sent me food while Téa was sick in hospital but no one else cares that I know semi-famous people and to mention it would be obnoxious.

I thought about trying to sell some websites at the reunion. Just a box of business cards and a smile and they will all be signing contracts. One night could set me up for next year. Not likely. Best leave the business at home.

That just leave wondering who will be there and if any of your group will be there. I know that there are a few people I would actually like to see. After looking over the reunion website (reunion website? Wonder if there are future business ideas there) I know that at least one of the people I would like to see there is living in another state. (hi peter if you're reading, if your not, well.......) I wonder how many others have moved to far away?

Chris Crocker

2007-09-15T09:22:00.000+08:00

In case you have somehow missed Chris Crocker's vblog about Britney please follow the link. Chris is probably most like the bad guy from Silence of the Lambs just before he cracks and thinks making a girl suit is a good idea.

Content like this should just normally be ignored so that the poster looses interest and goes back to contributing something other then a 'reality vblog'. Poor Chris, I blame MTV.

I wanted to share because he has attracted so many video responses that some are worth a look. Never to be left out, Seth Green has also done one.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kHmvkRoEowc

Retro Crap

2007-09-14T14:17:00.000+08:00

I was reminded of a time when animated crap ruled the internet today when someone showed me their old mess of a site, complete with midi music. I don't miss them one bit.

Email me at crap horridsite.com

The Next Step

2007-08-06T22:27:00.000+08:00

Since I post mostly YouTube videos here its about time I make my own video. Dull they may be but this is the best content I could find to try out YouTube for the first time.

Peak Hour On The Buses

2007-08-05T10:27:00.000+08:00

Buses have heaps of understeer at the best of times. Why not try and race them.....

Riding The Bus In LA

2007-08-05T10:13:00.000+08:00

'Excited and sad after seeing Who Killed The Electric Car Sarah and Shelley decide to no longer drive their cars until they are retrofitted to electricity. Their resolve to "saving the environment" is tested when they ride L.A.'s buses.'

What it's really like on the bus at night.

Triumph the Insult Comic Dog At The Tony Awards

2007-06-16T12:00:00.000+08:00

As seen on Late night with Conan O'Brien

Great Moments In Music #5

2007-05-27T19:18:00.000+08:00

B 52's - Love Shack

Oh how I hated this song when I was a kid. For a while you could always expect Love Shack to come last in all the music countdown shows.

Now unfortunatly my music tastes have changed and I really like the B52's. I would have shared this one sooner but they sound like Deelite.

Great Moments In Music #4

2007-04-23T17:44:00.000+08:00

Nirvana

The 'Seattle Movement' of the early '90s dictated how I dressed for the next eight years. While I missed out on the start of the Nirvana craze I quite happily jumped on board for Soundgardens album Superunknown.

While Nirvana didn't hit me for a couple of years, I still remember the countless playings of Smells Like Teen Spirit on the radio and tv. It was even popular enough for Weird Al to have a crack at it.

The bubble didn't last and Kurt ended the ride in '94. I don't remember where I was when I heard about it but he sure did make cool music.

Smells Like Teen Sprit

Soundgarden's Black Hole Sun

Great Moments In Music #3

2007-04-21T08:52:00.000+08:00

Tiffany

Who didn't crush on Tiffany Darwish back in '87! For me she was the older hot girl. Even though she was only 16 at the time she was an older woman to me.

Looking back at the 'I Think Were Alone Now' video sure does bring back memories but it's more cringe worthy now. The horrid dancing, big hair and bad video editing make it a four and a half minute comedy act. Parodys such as How I Met Your Mother's Robin Sparkles can't even live up to the cringe value.

Tiffany's debut album, amazingly called Tiffany, sold over eight million albums but like most other teenage acts her two follow ups failed to reach the same heights with her third album only selling around 200 000 copies.

In 2000 at the age of 29 Tiffany put herself out there again to forge a career as an adult. Her album was a success with the critics all giving it rave reviews.

I couldn't mention Tiffany without mentioning her Playboy pics. If your interested you can find them here. I know I was interested to see the '80's girl of my dreams and I wasn't disappointed.

Tiffany now earns a living as an entertainer and is doing well with another album out very very soon. She is also active in reality television circles.

Tiffany's Official Site

I Think Were Alone Now

'80's Parody Robin Sparkles

Great Moments In Music #2

2007-04-18T16:35:00.000+08:00

Massive Attack

Massive Attack came along during a time when I couldn't afford CD's. To get around this I would tape Rage (an all night music show in Australia) on video then the next day I would transfer the songs I liked to a cassette so I could listen to it in my room.

My four favourite bands from that time are Oasis, Blur, Portishead and Massive Attack. I'm sure that if I go through my old tape box if would be full of great Rage gems. Now that I have grown up and have money to buy whatever I want I have bought Blur, Portishead and Massive Attack. I no longer think Oasis is very good.

I have picked what must be the best two Massive Attack hits to share today, Protection and Tear drop. I have watched Protection countless times but when I was younger I hated the 58 second lag between the start of the video and the start of the music. Teardrop is a little freaky. If you haven't seen the Tear drop video before it is worth the five minutes.

Protection

Tear Drop

Things To Do When Your Bored #2

2007-04-15T13:37:00.000+08:00

Play Bus Driver on PC.

Great Moments In Music #1

2007-04-15T13:18:00.000+08:00

Over the next few weeks I want to share some great music memories.

Deee-Lite

While Deee-lite had four number one dance hits in the US, 'Groove Is In The Heart' would qualify as a one hit wonder. It's a great song that was played over and over in the sprit of a one hit wonder till everyone winced at the mere mention. 17 years on you could probably stand to hear it one more time.

Check out what Deee-lite have been up to lately at this
die hard fans site.

The End Of The World?

2007-03-11T19:23:00.000+09:00

I'm sorry but I'm with James Cameron on this one. You should never name anything skynet unless you want trouble!

Is Laughing Infectious?

2007-03-05T12:00:00.000+09:00

These quads sure do think so....

Get Out of my Head!

2007-02-23T12:42:00.000+09:00

I've had a song stuck in my head for about 23 years now and I wish it would let me live my life!

I'm sure you all know it. Maybe if you all click on the youtube video it will enter your head and leave me alone!

I couldn't find the original video of the song so heres the next best thing......

I love this next song too but it doesn't live in my head. Thank god!

Chris's delivery of the last line is awesome!

UK TV Show Paints Awful Picture Of The US

2007-02-16T21:12:00.000+09:00

Earlier in the week BBC car program Top Gear spent a whole hour telling it's viewers that America was an awful place to go and shouldn't be visited by anyone.

The shows presenters were placed in Florida with $1000 each, told to buy a car and then drive it across a few states to Louisiana to inspect the destruction of Hurricane Katrina one year on.

Now I have never felt a connection with the United States but I really felt uncomfortable with about just how much US bashing was featured in this episode.

OK, that being said the episode was really funny when Clarkson wasn't bashing his Atlantic neighbours. Here is an eight minute clip of the boys being chased out of Alabama after they wrote derogatory statements designed to cause trouble on their cars.

OK This One Is Just For The Nerds

2007-02-10T20:41:00.000+09:00

I saw this pic on a 'Caption This' contest with the winning caption being "Giant Wiimote rivals original Xbox controller in size." OK, the more that I read that the stupider it gets. Sorry, I'll just shut my big fat mouth. Well the original controller was crazy big though.

I love my XBOX, even if I do only play one or two games on it. Is it wrong to have a collection of 48 XBOX games and only ever play two of them? Maybe I should donate the rest to poor kids who cant afford games. Who am I kidding, they would just abuse me for not having Playstation 3 games!

PS If you are looking at this post with Mozilla, congrats! You are seeing the layout I had hoped for. If your looking with IE, sorry.

The Internet Is Just A Mouse Click Away

2007-02-06T07:06:00.000+09:00

Blockbuster Video's new ad that aired during the superbowl makes me laugh everytime I see it.

It so reminds me of the internet that we had back in the 90's

Jesus Camp

2007-02-04T15:26:00.000+09:00

Last night I think I watched the only documentary I have ever seen with no bias in its presentation. It is a real credit to it's directors Rachel Grady and Heidi Ewing.

Jesus Camp was able to effectively portray an honest and impartial depiction of one faction of the evangelical Christian community.

It's definitely worth seeking out but in the end I couldn't help but turn into Cartman from Southpark. I almost started making plans to move to America to join these people and ultimately get rich. I think Pastor Ted Haggard has that effect on some people.

Did I Leave A Blog Here?

2007-02-04T14:37:00.000+09:00

I never wanted to stop blogging but as with everything, life gets in the way. I've been able to spend a bit more time on the computer lately so I thought I would do some blogging too.

I give you the third re-invention of jaso32's blog, The Curse Of Great Beauty complete with a new template. Since my wife is the one who understands web design I have had trouble with the new template so it looks really cool in IE but sucks in Firefox. Isn't it usually the opposite?

Well if you visit here often you will probably find a few YouTube vids and not much substance but isn't that was blogging is really about?

Michael Schumacher Overtakes 1 Last Time

2006-11-04T08:59:00.000+08:00

As you can tell, I don't blog anymore but this is something worth sharing. Here is the result of a 5 lap battle for 4th with Kimi Raikkonen during which time Schumacher was robbed of his favourite passing spot due to yellow flags. Michael finally gets him when his favourite corner is opened up to passing.

Kimi believes that he has the line covered but it turned out that Michael knows how big his car is right down to the inch. This is also the last ever passing manover for Michael Schumacher in F1 racing.

Video from on board the Ferrari

The Boss Sends His Congratulations

2006-08-03T11:06:00.000+08:00

Comedy Central publicly congratulated South Park for its Emmy nomination in Variety this week.

South Park received its Emmy nod for its episode 'Trapped in the Closet' in which the kids are caught up in Scientology. The Ad speaks for itself.

Battlestar In Australia

2006-08-02T13:36:00.000+08:00

For those of you living in Australia and didn't get the episodes from other sources, Battlestar Gallactica Season 2 starts on TEN tonight at five past eleven. I'm sure I will use this an an excuse to relive the fun of Season Two.

Final scene from season 2. Yes its a spoiler but you really should have seen this by now

A Day That Will Live In Infamy

2006-07-28T10:59:00.000+08:00

Wednesday June 16th 2004 started like most days. The news was churning out hundreds of stories. It was the day that the Caribe mobile phone virus made headlines, it was the day David Vardy offered his virginity on ebay for 6000 pounds. It is also the day I reported on this blog that pervs were counting down the day until Emma Watson turns 18.

What was a harmless blog over 2 years ago is still responsible for 35% of hits on this site! I can't believe that one blog post 2 years ago about some actor from a Harry Potter movie can generate so many search engine hits! To put that into some sort of perspective, Don't Be Afraid Of Your Anger receives about 123 hits a week, 35% of those are looking for Emma!

I suppose if you are looking for hits on your blog, post endless pictures of celebs. It works for Perez.

Tealou's Recovery

2006-07-24T15:33:00.000+08:00

My wife has become very sick and is being kept unconscious in an Intensive Care Unit. She needs positive thoughts to help her on to the road to recovery. To help with this I have created a web log for her to tell her friends about what she is going through. While she would have wanted to keep this private I no longer feel that she can do this alone.

Visit Tealou's Recovery and stay up to date with what's going on.

Don't Copy That Floppy

2006-07-22T09:14:00.000+08:00

I just saw this on Needs To Be Glassed and just had to share. Its an anti-piracy video for kids titled 'Don't Copy That Floppy'. I think its from about 1992. Beware it is about nine and a half minutes but worth the look.

Question For Sufferers of Incontinence

2006-07-15T08:46:00.000+08:00

When you're feeling incontinent, do you have time to jump on the net and check for the location of a toilet?

As part of the National Continence Management Strategy the government now has a National Public Toilet Map to help the public locate public toilets in a crisis.

Maybe I'm not understanding the problem since the only incontinent person I know walks at about a meter a minute, doesn't speak or read English and doesn't bother with the toilet anymore. Maybe I'm just being my usual cynical self, this service could improve her life greatly, couldn't it?.

I'm sure with a bit more promotion people will stop saying "Have you checked to made sure the doors are locked?" when they leave home, replacing it with "Honey, have you checked the National public toilet map just incase we get caught out?"

I'm A Bit Sad Today

2006-06-05T10:36:00.000+08:00

The NBA team I have supported since Perth Centre Luc Longley played with them ended their season with a game 6 loss to Dallas.

I hope that since Dallas were good enough to beat the suns, they are good enough to finish the season with their own championship rings.

Things To Do When You're Bored #1

2006-05-13T23:28:00.000+08:00

Go to Hot or Not and click one for every picture.

Suns Advance to Semi-finals!

2006-05-07T10:57:00.000+08:00

Only moments ago the Phoenix Suns put away The LA Lakers with a commanding win in Game 7, 121 to 90! Leandro Barbosa led the way with 26 points.

The Suns had trailed the Lakers three games to one in the best of seven series.

Phoenix now intend to destroy the LA peoples finals hopes as they take on the LA Clippers in the semi-finals. This is the first time the Clippers have advanced to the semi-finals in thirty years.

Ghostbusters sequel

2006-05-06T08:50:00.000+08:00

I don't normally like the idea of movie sequels but it occurred to me in the shower the other morning, where all good ideas come from, that a Ghostbusters 3 could do really well.

There is something really comical about a bunch of old guys having to put on those heavy proton packs and saving the world again. Remembering that Harold Ramis and Ernie Hudson, the oldest of the Ghostbusters, are 61 and 60 respectively.

Plus don't forget that little Oscar would be 17 now. I'm sure that an apathetic 17 year old would fit into the mix.

Come on Dan, Harold and Ivan. Don't you guys need a new house? Make Ghostbusters 3.

My Greatest achievement?

2006-04-30T14:56:00.000+08:00

Finally after months of playing an 82 game season as well as a full series of finals the Suns are finally victorious, in NBA Live 06 on my XBOX. Can my game imitate reality? Not unless the Suns can first beat the Lakers!

How Much Do You Really See Trackside?

2006-04-23T10:35:00.000+08:00

My whole life I have followed Formula 1 racing quite closely. I make sure I never miss a race and have supported the Williams team since Damon Hill. Its an added bonus that Mark Webber drives a Williams but I will also support him no matter where he goes. One thing I have never been able to do is go to a race but now, thanks to YouTube, I can feel what it is like to be trackside for the final moments of a Grand Prix. I have to admitt, you see alot more on the TV!

Things You Should Know #1

2006-04-22T08:21:00.000+08:00

Never search for 'creampie' in Google Images with safe search turned off!

Would the Real Ricky Gervais Please Stand Up?

2006-03-28T10:21:00.000+08:00

Believe it or not, one of these pic's are of an animated Gervais. But which one?

Only his Mother knows for sure!

Don't You Just Love TV Cliffhangers!

2006-03-14T12:20:00.000+08:00

NOT!

Well at least I have something to look forward to. Here is a shot from the last scene of Battlestar Galactica.

Have the humans finially come to the end of the line? Proabaly not. Bring on October!

For Those Of You Who Watch 'Lost'

2006-02-18T08:32:00.000+08:00

What the hell are these?????????

I have theorys about most things on 'Lost' but i'm ,dare I say, lost on this one. I sure hope they didn't unleash anything too horible, for their sake.

*EDIT*
After a Google search, popular opinion is that this could translate to "Cause to Die". Ominous.

The Religion Quiz

2006-02-05T19:52:00.000+08:00

By now you have seen this quiz everywhere, so here is my results.

You scored as Satanism. Your beliefs most closely resemble those of Satanism! Before you scream, do a bit of research on it. To be a Satanist, you don't actually have to believe in Satan. Satanism generally focuses upon the spiritual advancement of the self, rather than upon submission to a deity or a set of moral codes. Do some research if you immediately think of the satanic cult stereotype. Your beliefs may also resemble those of earth-based religions such as paganism.

Satanism

83%

agnosticism

71%

atheism

63%

Buddhism

46%

Paganism

38%

Islam

33%

Judaism

29%

Christianity

21%

Hinduism

17%

Which religion is the right one for you? (new version)
created with QuizFarm.com

For some reason, my wife doesn't seem happy with my result.

How Do You Know You Have Given Up On Your Blog?

2006-01-14T17:32:00.000+08:00

When you realize that you announced the birth of your baby boy only seven posts after announcing that you are expecting.

Poor Guy

2005-11-12T20:39:00.000+08:00

I feel sorry for any guy that looks like me! PocKet umm I mean TasChe, keep your sweet chestnut crust on elder sauce to yourself.

Community Service Announcement

2005-08-21T01:14:00.000+08:00

Want to make sure you never have unprotected sex with a new partner ever again?

Women click this link.

Men click this one.

(WARNING!!! Graphic pictures not for the faint of heart!!!)

Buy This

2005-08-21T00:20:00.000+08:00

But She's Too Young To Die!

2005-06-18T08:32:00.000+08:00

After 20 years of service this type of bus will be phased out over the next few months. As they are powered by CNG their fate doesn't look good. Goodbye friends.

Is this what will happen to me when I get too old?

A Post To Save April

2005-04-30T19:15:00.000+08:00

With my one woman cheer squad (the ever impatient PocKet) behind me I thought it was high time I posted to this waste of cyber space. Not because I have something to say, not because PocKet asked for it but because if I don't get a post off before midnight tonight, April will never make it to the Archives list.

Sure I could fake the date on one of my future posts but it just wouldn't be the same, I wouldn't be the same. I would know that stuck out there in the vast open realm of the internet a lie would be lurking and that I had put it there.

So here you go April, even though you suck because I have to buy an anniversary present and two birthday presents during your thirty day reign, I have saved you from being a gap in my Archives section.

Kite Of Mass Destruction

2005-03-27T06:47:00.000+08:00

Can someone tell me how high you need to be before you enter 'airspace'?

During this years protests at the Baxter detention centre in South Australia it seems that a woman was arrested for flying a kite in restricted air space.

Have the media forgotten to report on something? Was this woman trying to fly it into the detention centre to drop off something?

If the only story here is that this poor woman was flying a kite in the wrong place then congratulations go out to the South Australian police, you have officially over reacted.

International Sport? Not In WA!

2005-03-21T20:40:00.000+08:00

Since 1989 Perth has been the proud host of a FIA World Rally Championship round. Every year thousands of WA locals have been able to hold their heads high knowing that we had something out eastern states relatives didn't. Thanks to our newly elected government that could all change very shortly.

Today Tourism Minister Mark McGowan stated that the government are looking to end the contract with the FIA with the final Rally Australia to be at the end of the year. Claiming dwindling returns he said that the governments $4.7 million investment in the event could be better spent on other events and promotions.

So its goodbye to international fame (even if it is only in rally circles) and hello to Perth where?