The SSM survey result made me nauseous

Today the results of Australia's marriage equality survey (or same sex marriage survey for those who wanted the word equality removed) were published. I've been told by more than a few that a result of 62% in favor is an overwhelming success, so why does the result make me feel nauseous?

80% or 12.73 million eligible Australians returned a valid survey. From those, 4.87 million people voted no to the question "Should the law be changed to allow same-sex couples to marry?”

4.87 million. That's the number I can't get out of my head. 38% of Australians feel that for whatever reason, some Australians should not have the same rights I have enjoyed. Twice!

Perhaps my nauseous stomach can be explained a different way. I believe the survey question can be interchanged in a way that I hope would reduced the no vote, dramatically.

Try, "Do you agree with Article 1 of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights? Namely, 'All human beings are born free and equal in dignity and rights. They are endowed with reason and conscience and should act towards one another in a spirit of brotherhood.'"

What Aussie could argue with that? And if we are all equal in rights then shouldn't that include marriage?

4.87 million Australians. That's an awful amount of people who think their shit doesn't stink.

A few quick facts:
•LGBTQI people exist. They are as real as you and they had the same amount of choice in deciding their sexuality as anyone else. You can't catch any of it from exposure.
•Marriage pre-dates religion. Get your Lord and saviour away from my marriage! Marriage started as a way to consolidate wealth and land. During the early days of marriage you were most likely to be married to your siblings or cousins.
•Same sex couples all ready exist. They are everywhere. They are raising children. No amount of denial will change that.

iPhones For The Old?

It wasn't so long ago, my father was absolutely afraid of touch screens. His anti-touch screen rhetoric was so loud and obnoxious, I was genuinely worried about how he would adjust in the future. A future where everything from ATMs, to TVs, to cars would somehow incorporate touch screens.

Imagine my surprise a few weeks ago, when during one of my irregular visits, Dad shows me his iPad! I was surprised but mostly relieved. Relieved he had embraced touch screens. Relieved I wouldn't have to make trips to the bank for him for years to come, because he was too afraid to withdraw money from the ATM.

Happy with a new toy I had recently bought, I showed Mum and Dad my iPhone 4S. Mum ohhhed and ahhhed over my new toy as I shared a few of its functions with them, while Dad took his regular stance against everything new, making regular quips about the pointlessness of near all of the 4S' features. Half jokingly, Mum suggested she get one, attracting jeers about pointlessness and price from her husband of almost 34 years.

Easter arrived and the family gathered at my parents house for a combined Easter-Dad's birthday lunch. Dad was practically buzzing, aching to show me his new present. A brand new iPhone! Not only did he have one, they had bought one for mum too! Jokingly I said it was unlike him to pay $60 a month for a phone. I didn't realise how wrong I was, they bought the phones outright from the Apple store! That's an $1800 outlay on the spot for two phones they have minimal understanding of! Still, I was impressed and gladly answered my Dad's request for help to getting the most out of his new toy.

Dad's favourite feature of his new toy? He can set custom ring-tones. Initially I was surprised he had worked out how to install the tones, as any iPhone user knows, Apple haven't made it straight-forward. I suspect my brother had something to do with the installation. My initial surprised slowly turned to dark thoughts of murder as he showed me all his favourite tones for 45 minutes! At some point I drifted into thoughts of maliciously destroying his phone with the heaviest bat I could find!

Next I sat down with him and went through his settings. My brother had done a good job. Finally, Dad wanted to know about all the apps I thought he could use. This was by far the most frustrating. He rejected every one of my ideas, as if installing it on his phone would somehow cut into the 27GB he has free on the phones hard drive.

Dad has managed to spend $900 on a phone, the most amazing phone I have ever owned, and chose to use only the features that are available on a $25 Telstra pre-paid from Big W. But surely he will at least use it for music? Nope, he still prefers his old iPod for that. No MMS, doesn't even use email! I'm glad has understood the need to adapt to some new technologies, like touch screens, but a brand new 4S? That was clearly a waste of computing power.

Siri Is So Frigid!

Siri, the voice activated helper on the iPhone 4s, can be a lot of fun and, when you push her out of her comfort zone, can be funny without trying.

Here is some of my dirtier conversations trying to get Siri to put out....