Today was meant to be my article on divorce. I feel pretty down today as the Twitter gossip mill still hatefully churns in my absence so instead I'll spoon feed this link. It's a pretty cool article by Amanda Fortini.
The Facebook Divorce
Friday, November 05, 2010
Thursday, November 04, 2010
Social Media: Can I Get A Patch?
Self help and support groups exist for just about every addiction and activity, why not social media? Like smokers, the first thing I would grab for in the morning was Twitter. Like and alcoholic, I would Tweet in bed till I fell asleep. I would reward myself after every activity with a check of Twitter on my iPhone. Are these not the actions of someone with a problem?
There is no patch or way to moderate so how do you solve the social media addiction? The short answer, I don't know. I searched the net for hours trying to find something to help me. The best I could find was "use in moderation". That's great for normal people. I can drink in moderation, I can even smoke in moderation but Twitter in moderation? Unless Michael Malone himself, comes out of the sky and limits my net access, I will be forever drawn to Twitter. Its my connection, its my world.
What I did to fight the social media addiction isn't for everybody but Im sure, like most things, it will get better over time. Account deletion. There is no turning back from account deletion. Twitter currently has no ability to restore old accounts. Once that small button is clicked, it's all gone, super quick and no fuss. Two years of friend finding, like sharing and rant posting, gone! Was it premature? I had planned on doing it on Saturday but a couple of things brought it forward and in the heat of the moment I sent that account into purgatory for all its sins..... I so want it back!
I wonder how @sach33's crochless pants are holding up in the heat? Did @kendylahlah's new fan help? Which young girl is @GeoffD710 being dirty with today? What is @miss_yolie wearing?
As you can see, nothing on Twitter is truly important but it's addictive. I wish I had some answers.
There is no patch or way to moderate so how do you solve the social media addiction? The short answer, I don't know. I searched the net for hours trying to find something to help me. The best I could find was "use in moderation". That's great for normal people. I can drink in moderation, I can even smoke in moderation but Twitter in moderation? Unless Michael Malone himself, comes out of the sky and limits my net access, I will be forever drawn to Twitter. Its my connection, its my world.
What I did to fight the social media addiction isn't for everybody but Im sure, like most things, it will get better over time. Account deletion. There is no turning back from account deletion. Twitter currently has no ability to restore old accounts. Once that small button is clicked, it's all gone, super quick and no fuss. Two years of friend finding, like sharing and rant posting, gone! Was it premature? I had planned on doing it on Saturday but a couple of things brought it forward and in the heat of the moment I sent that account into purgatory for all its sins..... I so want it back!
I wonder how @sach33's crochless pants are holding up in the heat? Did @kendylahlah's new fan help? Which young girl is @GeoffD710 being dirty with today? What is @miss_yolie wearing?
As you can see, nothing on Twitter is truly important but it's addictive. I wish I had some answers.
Wednesday, November 03, 2010
That felt so good
I was going to put off deleting Twitter till Saturday but after having a pretty shit and emotional day I just did it and it felt good!
I will continue writing to the theme of this week on my blog but now I don't have twitter to advertise them they probably wont be read. :)
I will continue writing to the theme of this week on my blog but now I don't have twitter to advertise them they probably wont be read. :)
Social Media: Gossip Girls, The Peep Culture
It starts young. Six year olds whispering about who is boyfriend and girlfriend, who likes who and guess who was in the tree K.I.S.S.I.N.G. Unfortunately getting older doesn't add sophistication just levels of animosity and hate. That girl is up herself, that guy moved on awful fast, he shouldn't see her, they are having sex, did you hear about what she did to those other guys...... Gossip is prevalent and not going anywhere.
In 2006, Twitter enters the online market with a simple idea, to broadcast SMS style messages to an audience. A harmless idea in 2006, largely baulked at by peers, has grown into an international success with over 100 million subscribers. The world stepped into the peep culture.
Peep culture is best described by Hal Niedzviecki in The Peep Diaries,
So what does it really mean to us? Gossip, on a large scale and generally through people with no real knowledge of the person they are gossiping about is dangerous. Gossip passes so quickly, any ounce of truth is passed off for the muddy story, the lies and deceit. In an online environment, where relationships are formed and lost so passionately and quickly, friendship is a tradable commodity.
So who can you trust? The answer is everybody but it comes with conditions. To survive in a Twitter world you have to accept everybody at face value. If you really like someone but hear they have been talking about you behind your back, consider the source. File the information under gossip and move on. It's likely to be a concoction or a muddle of chinese whispers regurgitated by someone who really doesn't like you.
What happens if I find out exactly who has been lying and gossiping about me? Block and remove them. It wont stop them gossiping about you but it will remove some of their ability to spy and twist your innocent tweets. The simple act of blocking someone carries a lot of power in the Twitter world, I'm always surprised by just how many people get upset by an un-follow.
Online Gossip has been most damaging to me personally over the last few months. It has caused fights that have lasted days between my ex and I and it has hurt people close to me. If we don't remove its power it will destroy all our real world relationship leaving us with...... Twitter.
Continue to check back as I spend the week analysing the peep culture before removing myself from the party.
In 2006, Twitter enters the online market with a simple idea, to broadcast SMS style messages to an audience. A harmless idea in 2006, largely baulked at by peers, has grown into an international success with over 100 million subscribers. The world stepped into the peep culture.
Peep culture is best described by Hal Niedzviecki in The Peep Diaries,
We have entered the age of "peep culture": a tell-all, show-all, know-all digital phenomenon that is dramatically altering notions of privacy, individuality, security, and even humanity. Peep culture is reality TV, YouTube, MySpace, Facebook, Twitter, over-the-counter spy gear, blogs, chat rooms, amateur porn, surveillance technology, Dr. Phil, Borat, cell phone photos of your drunk friend making out with her ex-boyfriend, and more. In the age of peep, core values and rights we once took for granted are rapidly being renegotiated, often without our even noticing.
So what does it really mean to us? Gossip, on a large scale and generally through people with no real knowledge of the person they are gossiping about is dangerous. Gossip passes so quickly, any ounce of truth is passed off for the muddy story, the lies and deceit. In an online environment, where relationships are formed and lost so passionately and quickly, friendship is a tradable commodity.
So who can you trust? The answer is everybody but it comes with conditions. To survive in a Twitter world you have to accept everybody at face value. If you really like someone but hear they have been talking about you behind your back, consider the source. File the information under gossip and move on. It's likely to be a concoction or a muddle of chinese whispers regurgitated by someone who really doesn't like you.
What happens if I find out exactly who has been lying and gossiping about me? Block and remove them. It wont stop them gossiping about you but it will remove some of their ability to spy and twist your innocent tweets. The simple act of blocking someone carries a lot of power in the Twitter world, I'm always surprised by just how many people get upset by an un-follow.
Online Gossip has been most damaging to me personally over the last few months. It has caused fights that have lasted days between my ex and I and it has hurt people close to me. If we don't remove its power it will destroy all our real world relationship leaving us with...... Twitter.
Continue to check back as I spend the week analysing the peep culture before removing myself from the party.
Monday, November 01, 2010
Social Media: The First Hit is Free
Some moments stand out in the memory. The first kiss with someone new, the birth of a child, the day a musician died, our life is full of memories most important to us. Two days that cant be forgotten for some are the day they signed up to Facebook and the day they let Twitter into their lives.
I rejected Facebook at first. Finally, under almost crushing weight from friends and old school mates I joined Facebook in late 2007 as a way to connect with school friends before my ten year high school reunion. Almost instantly I began filling my time with games of rock, paper, scissors and Battleship with people I haven't seen in almost ten years. The social media addiction had begun and the first hit was free!
November 2008 my partner was away at The Edge of the Web, a conference held in Perth by The Australian Web Industry Association. I cant recall how I noticed but my partner, along with most of the conference, had started using Twitter as a way of passing notes in class. Seeing a way of being able to communicate with her while she sat in a lecture, I signed up to Twitter and joined in the conversation.
Over the next two years my involvement with Twitter grew. Eventually I met avatars in real life, became involved in the lives of strangers and found dates. After an accident which left me without work, Twitter replaced the relationships I had lost with colleagues and friends from work. After separating with my partner, Twitter became company at night when the house was quiet. I started checking Twitter every 5 minutes during the household chores and even tweet while driving. Twitter had crossed over and replaced real life.
Recently, as a result of separation from my partner of 10 years and a connection with the lives of the avatars, Twitter has become the dumping ground for hear-say, lies and gossip. Unfortunately the human condition promotes embellished stories and chinese whispers. Truth gets pushed aside for a better story and sympathy regardless who those lies may hurt. The need to win support from those who happily gossip and fuel the lies for their own amusement becomes justification to make the lies bigger. The result becomes a lawyers dream where the truth is buried deep down under the pile of defamation.
My ex has been a great friend and mother to our kids for almost half my life. I've always wanted to love and support her the best I can. I feel no anger towards her and wish her all the happiness in the world. I'm excited for her and the adventures she will have in the future. I have always considered her unique and beautiful with a drive that will bring her the world.
During this week I will try to delve deeper into the peep culture before finally removing myself from the party. Leaving the party while its still in full force can't stop the gossip but I hope it can dull the conversation.
I rejected Facebook at first. Finally, under almost crushing weight from friends and old school mates I joined Facebook in late 2007 as a way to connect with school friends before my ten year high school reunion. Almost instantly I began filling my time with games of rock, paper, scissors and Battleship with people I haven't seen in almost ten years. The social media addiction had begun and the first hit was free!
November 2008 my partner was away at The Edge of the Web, a conference held in Perth by The Australian Web Industry Association. I cant recall how I noticed but my partner, along with most of the conference, had started using Twitter as a way of passing notes in class. Seeing a way of being able to communicate with her while she sat in a lecture, I signed up to Twitter and joined in the conversation.
Over the next two years my involvement with Twitter grew. Eventually I met avatars in real life, became involved in the lives of strangers and found dates. After an accident which left me without work, Twitter replaced the relationships I had lost with colleagues and friends from work. After separating with my partner, Twitter became company at night when the house was quiet. I started checking Twitter every 5 minutes during the household chores and even tweet while driving. Twitter had crossed over and replaced real life.
Recently, as a result of separation from my partner of 10 years and a connection with the lives of the avatars, Twitter has become the dumping ground for hear-say, lies and gossip. Unfortunately the human condition promotes embellished stories and chinese whispers. Truth gets pushed aside for a better story and sympathy regardless who those lies may hurt. The need to win support from those who happily gossip and fuel the lies for their own amusement becomes justification to make the lies bigger. The result becomes a lawyers dream where the truth is buried deep down under the pile of defamation.
My ex has been a great friend and mother to our kids for almost half my life. I've always wanted to love and support her the best I can. I feel no anger towards her and wish her all the happiness in the world. I'm excited for her and the adventures she will have in the future. I have always considered her unique and beautiful with a drive that will bring her the world.
During this week I will try to delve deeper into the peep culture before finally removing myself from the party. Leaving the party while its still in full force can't stop the gossip but I hope it can dull the conversation.
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